> jumping into life.

« Home | i got a job! i'm going kickboxing! i wrote two poe... » | afternoon. clouds lie like old quilts, layered on ... » | the air is somehow warm without seeming to give up... » | A jungle is not a forest. A forest is quiet - it k... » | it seems like every time i sit down these days, i ... » | advisory: do not attempt to laugh immediately afte... » | (off to oregon to visit cousins for a while. happy... » | sometimes i don't even recognize myself in the mir... » | it isn't so much that the mind boggles, like scott... » | i got your letter and it left me crying in the cof... » 

1.18.2004 

between kickboxing and yoga i think i find some peace. the white mat of the dojo against the red bags and all reflected in a wall of mirrors, all of us punching with pigtails dancing to brick house. the world contracts to the sharp sound of the bag against my glove. my calves burn and burn and i lose my breath and when we stumble into the coffeeshop afterwards, exhausted, elated, i have hardly the strength to lift the backgammon board. that was friday. today my calves and thighs and shoulders still ached as we began surya namaskar, but slowly the world contracted to the sound of my breath and the knot on the wood-paneled wall before me. by the end my heels sat easily on the floor and i stretched and stretched back against my happy calves. the energy moves out; the energy moves in.


kickboxing alone makes me feel wild and jagged and satisfied, and yoga alone makes me feel quiet and dim and whole. i think the two together will do well to balance all my opposing parts, the need for centering that always pulls against the need for release.